On giving thanks.

I have so many things to be thankful for this year. This time of Thanksgiving allows us to share with others the bounty that we have received. Of love, three beautiful girls that greet me with hugs and exclamations of “Mom’s home!” at the end of a hard day. Of love overflowed, a husband, who has spent all day cleaning, cooking, and caring for said girls. The smell of a home cooked meal that evokes all the feelings of the holidays in one breath.

In medicine, at the end of a tough case that had a great outcome, it’s hard to be anything but thankful. You don’t feel successful. You don’t feel triumphant. You are just thankful that the patient survived and so did you. I did my first crash cesarean. Living in small town America, it was bound to happen. This is how and why I chose the rural training and subsequent attending life I chose. The call came just minutes before my 24-hour holiday ER shift started. Decision to incision was 37 minutes. Incision to baby was 1 minute. Many of those 38 minutes had the father on his knees. I interrupted his prayers as I rounded the corner to scrub. He stood and apologized. I begged him to continue. For now, I could not be on my knees praying. I had to stand at the table, scalpel in hand, in an effort to save not one but two lives. But what he did not know, was that I too was frantically seeking guidance from God to watch over us, guide us, and protect the lives of mom and baby. I found him there, after I closed with the final counts correct, still praying. Thankfully, we had a healthy mom and babe to celebrate.

Thankfully, I had an OR staff at the ready, called from the warmth of their homes with their families. Thankfully, I had a partner, not on call, but at the ready to scrub and support an infant who was not quite ready to be born. Thankfully, I had another partner, willing to eat a cold meal to cover my ER shift while my OB patient took precedence. Thankfully, I had a hospital that was willing to let me be the kind of doctor I want to be.   Thankfully, I had training that prepared me to succeed. Thankfully, I have faith, that at the end of the day, God has put me here for a reason.winston

At the end of the day, I have not gotten so busy making a living that I’ve forgotten to make a life. No, I am busy making a life worth living. So thankful to be busy doing it!

2 Responses to "On giving thanks."

  • I am glad, so glad, that you get to be the kind of doctor you want to be. So happy for you. <3

    1 Mariah said this (November 29, 2016 at 2:11 am) Reply

  • How do you begin to be gracious and grateful for the amazing God moment that brought us together. You are doing great work and the difference is -you know why. You have been blessed with so many talents. The promises that we read about, you are the fullfillment of them. Continue to take each day as they come. Leaving behind the mistakes of yesterday, the anxiety of tomorrow and just live for the day. You are an amazing human being my friend, and I-so much of better person for having you in my life. Keep writing -it feeds my soul. Love you

    2 Dr. Black Sheep said this (July 27, 2017 at 12:40 am) Reply

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